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SexFX

Yknow why porn needs better special effects?  So that we can have some pretty far out, trippy, fantasorgasmic jack off material, especially now with blu-ray technology.

You ever see the Fantastic Four, or know what it is?  Anyway, there’s this dude Mr Fantastic (go figure) and he can totally stretch out any part of his body like miles and miles long, or whatever…dude, that’s the type of special effect fucking they need in some porn movies.

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They say if your cock is big enough you can tame any pussy. I Guess a massive shlong vs a Sabre Tooth Tiger is the ultimate test.

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What The Fuck Is Up With The Internet?

When I hopped on my computer tonight, the unthinkable happened’a fucking blackout occurred (which killed the router), and I couldn’t believe that the electricity wasn’t back up within a few minutes. I lit up a couple of candles and afterwards, went into my car and turned on some news radio to figure out what was going on. I wasn’t dressed to go out (nor was I in the mood) and I could not groom myself into mac-mode with the lack of lighting I had, so I was in a fuckin rut. It was too early to sleep, so I said Fuck It ?¦ I rolled up a joint, grabbed my computer, blew out the candles and went to a local coffee shop dressed like a fuckin bum.

I’m not a big coffee drinker, so I sipped on some chai tea while surfing the net. Being out in public made the Internet somewhat boring because there was a sense of restriction I felt. Of course, it’s common courtesy to not have anything offensive on the screen, but fuck, there were no kids around ‘ and even if there were any minors, they still looked old enough to just mind their business. My high was killed pretty fuckin quickly with the dilemma I was having and I stayed in the coffee shop no longer than half an hour before striking out of there. It didn’t help that fugly chicks surrounded the place.

I came to a realization that I needed porn in my life. Don’t get it twisted’I love porn as much as the next guy, but having it taken away from me, even if it’s momentarily (and involuntarily), is un-fuckin-constitutional. I’m not someone who needs it 24/7, but I do need access to it at all times ‘ especially TrashyToons.com. The fucked up in the head animators over there have me constantly rolling in laughter, and at the same time relieve any tension I am feeling; it’s therapeutic, if you will. And what is a man without his health?

As I took my first rip from the bong to recharge, the lights magically came back on and it was on and poppin. I used my FREE TRIAL and conquered my mission. Rest and relaxation is the perfect fuckin way to end a Wednesday night ?¦

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An angry woman walks down the street and is on her way to see the boss man about a problem she is having. When she gets there, he sees her dressed up in a naughty dress that gets his juices flowing, but sits and waits to hear the problem she is facing. She tells him about a man that is causing some turmoil in her life and wishes for him to be dealt with. Knowing how problem can be solved right away with a rather easy solution.

Now that he had solved her problem, he needed his problem solved; the raging hardon inside his pants! Knowing that it’s only right to return the favor, she agrees to give him the best blowjob that he has ever had! She nude off his clothes and took her dress off, revealing her naughty ebony thigh highs. He laid on the floor of his office and she began to service his wood and sucking on it!

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